Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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