Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize