Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
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