I CAN MOONWALK!
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
