big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I am one with the molecules
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
