btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Randomize
