She went from zero to smokin in five shots
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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