Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
