I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
