About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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