Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
