I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
