Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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