You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
