we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
