I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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