so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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