He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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