Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
