i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
