I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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