She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
