I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Randomize