Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize