Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
