What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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