Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
