In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
