smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize