I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
