she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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