Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Pooping to opera.
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