"it" just moved
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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