hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
