Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I bet he comes in French.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
