I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Randomize
