After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Pants are for mortals
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
