it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
