I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize