He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
