Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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