How'd it feel making her break her religion?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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