Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize
