CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
