This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
