hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize