There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
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