Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
