thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Woke up backwards on a recliner
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
