ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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